DNA of Communion as a youth group lifestyle

"Fun”, “family”, “love” were words used by teens to describe CONNECT, a youth group at Holy Family Parish in Corpus Christi. Along with their religious education classes, CONNECT is an integral part of preparing teens before they receive the sacrament of confirmation. 

CONNECT is an experience where we aim to build up the “Three Connections.” They are all interwoven and essential to one another: The first is the connection with God, which is strengthened and complemented by our connection with our neighbors and finally brings us to a greater connection with ourselves – our truest identity. 

The core group is made of young adults, a young mom, and the two of us. We meet every Wednesday with the intention to grow in our personal connection with God and with each other. We pray, reflect, share, challenge each other and plan activities for the teens. We hold each other accountable to live out the Gospel and the principles of the “DNA of Communion” which in a beautiful way, supports our desire to grow in the three connections. 

The methodology that we use for CONNECT is based on the “Head, Hearts and Hands” approach. We believe that this supports the teens in integrating every area of their lives as followers of Jesus. We give presentations, share, reflect, and pray as part of nourishing the heart. We bring speakers with certain expertise on the Social Doctrine of the Church or other matters to cultivate the minds, and we love to serve through “hands-on” experiences to strengthen our hands. 

Christina Zuniga, one of the core group members shares a story: “About six months ago we had a new teen, who started coming to the youth group after one of the service projects. She is predominantly Spanish-speaking and understands little English. I am the opposite, but we worked well together at the service project because it didn’t involve much talking. This also challenged me because I wanted to do more and create a connection beyond “¿Cómo estás?” So, later when I went to our Spanish Mass, I would practice two sentences in case I saw her, and when I did, I would speak them to her, and she’d be surprised and smile. 

“She was one teen who amazed me because she would faithfully come to our weekly meetings even though we didn’t always have someone to translate the entire meeting. When we had to move our meetings online because of social distancing, she still came. With the help of Google translate, these new activities provided another opportunity to try to integrate a bit more Spanish when we shared. In one of the online sessions, she shared that she was grateful to us,” Zuniga said. She always felt welcomed and never felt like an outsider because of the language barrier. She saw and felt the love for everything that we did for her. And that’s when it clicked – love was the reason she kept coming back.”

She has now become one of CONNECT’s teen leaders and a faithful and enthusiastic promoter of CONNECT’s lifestyle of mutual love.

Reaching the boys can at times be more challenging. Nick Valadez, like many teenage boys, began attending CONNECT, begrudgingly. It was obviously a struggle for him, and he would have certainly preferred to be at home on his Xbox. In the beginning, he would often test boundaries, refusing to participate in activities or worse, take refuge in his cellphone. Our response as a core team was clear: “The DNA of communion.” 

To be the first to love, always welcoming him with a smile and being interested in what he was living, putting ourselves in his shoes. Many of us, in fact, had been in the same situation as teens and remember well how difficult and awkward those years were. The breakthrough moment for Nick (and for many of the teens) came when we visited the Mother Teresa Shelter where they encountered Jesus in the men and women they fed and visited. The transformation in Nick was evident, he was much more engaged and joyful in our weekly meetings and was the first one to sign up for extra-curricular events, such as a Diocesan Holy Hour for youth - the first one he had ever attended. 

Nick was confirmed last May. At the end of the summer, I called him to see if he would consider coming back to CONNECT as a teen leader. He told me he would think about it and then before hanging up, as an aside he said: “Oh yeah, Bob, the other day I was driving, and I saw this man who had broken down on the side of the road. I was going to keep going but then I thought about CONNECT and loving others as I would like to be loved, and so I stopped and helped him.” 

He shared this small-great act of kindness with great simplicity, but the joy was palpable. Reflecting on Nick’s simple decision to love brings to mind Bishop’s words: “Loving daily in this way can revolutionize the Church and bring her to witness love before the world, yearning for a witness. We must not imagine love as something superficial or romantic. Love is a commitment to step beyond our personal comfort and convenience. Love puts “others” first in contrast to a society that proclaims “me” first.

Since the pandemic, we have tried to look for new ways of accompanying all “CONNECTORS” and their families. One way that has helped us keep connected to the teens and motivate one another to live the Gospel in our daily lives has been the “Daily Connection.” It originally started in April as a noon appointment that usually lasted for 20 minutes. Since school started up again, we moved it to 6 p.m. Normally, it is a small group of teens and leaders that gather online. We usually have quick check-ins, share news and stories about the ‘CONNECT challenge of the week’ and pray for the end of the pandemic and those who could not make it to the Connection. 

Most of our Sunday sessions are online, although we are now offering in-person sessions once a month as an alternative for those who are ready to meet in this way again. It has been a joy for all of us to be able to offer these two possibilities once a month. Another amazing moment that we had recently was a parish Mass fostered by the teens in October. Many of them volunteered with great generosity and diligence. They served as lectures, singers, host team members and helped with a project to beautify the church. It was a powerful testimony of the beauty of faith lived out in a young person. 

Last year, we studied all the characteristics of The DNA of Communion with the teens: love everyone, be the first to love, love your enemy, love Jesus in your neighbor, and love one another. We did it through presentations, reflections, and, most importantly, through the sharing of personal experiences. As a core group, we commit to living out these principles before we pass it on to the teens. In this way, what we propose is based on the life and not only in theory.  

A special focus on service days is to discover Jesus’ presence in those who suffer, as we are reminded in Bishop Mulvey’s pastoral Letter, “The grace to see Jesus in every person is the key to finding the presence of Jesus each day in those we meet.” Some of the most beautiful moments of growth as individuals and as a group were those serving at the Mother Teresa Shelter.

During this pandemic, we have witnessed a slight decrease in the number of teens that are regularly attending the sessions. At the same time, we have experienced growth in the quality of relationships and mutual love. We also see the edifying personal commitment of some of the confirmed teens that choose to continue with CONNECT in the role of a teen leader. 

Our journey with CONNECT began more than two years ago, and it has been a God-centered adventure since day one. His presence and guidance have been very tangible and concrete every step of the way, from forming the core team and suggesting the name to coming up with new ways to engage teens during the pandemic. It is a source of deep joy to be part of this experience of building the Church.

Undoubtedly, we often fail to live this out perfectly. Nevertheless, we have seen that authentic effort and a desire to practice these traits of divine love generate an atmosphere that fosters growth spiritually, physically and mentally. We wish for CONNECT not to be a program but a lifestyle that all of us, teens and leaders, can live by.