Marriage is critical to healthy families, the Church and society

The vocation of marriage is critical to healthy families, the Church and society. The Church has realized for centuries that the basic relationship in the life of the Church is the covenant relationship between a man and a woman called marriage. 

As a mother, the Church wants to bring us to the fullness of life; she wants us to live in conformity with the way God has created us, according to what God has written in our hearts, according to the natural law.

Mother Church teaches us that marriage is a covenant, a partnership for life between a man and a woman. That is the definition of marriage in the mind of God and revealed to us through the Scriptures. Christ reminds us that, “…from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female…For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate (Mt 19:4-6).”

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that marriage is a “matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a partnership of the whole of life, and is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring …(CCC 1601).” The help that spouses give to one another is not only focused on their time on earth, but also aimed at assisting each other to eternal life. Thus the first goal of the spouses is to help each other become saints.

The other goal of marriage is children. The union of husband and wife is oriented toward new life, the most precious gift of marriage. Children are the sacred gift of love. They are to be welcomed from the moment of conception. They are never to be disregarded, ignored or abused.  They are to be accompanied through life, taught and cared for as children of God.

 When a marriage is validly contracted as a covenant between a baptized man and woman in the Church it becomes a sacrament. And as a sacrament, the marriage relationship is holy and sacred. This sacramental nature introduces Jesus Christ–a silent partner–into the couple’s relationship. 

His intimate presence in marriage cannot be bought. It is a gift that comes through the sacrament. His presence, which is grace, is given as an underserved gift from God assisting the couple to respond to their vocation. The grace he offers helps them respond to all aspects of being married from raising children to work and all the challenges they face each day. 

In living their sacrament, husbands and wives should remember the words of Jesus: “I am the vine, you are the branches. Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing (Jn 15:5).”

Married couples are not immune from temptations that can lead to sin and to a distortion of marriage, even to a breakdown of marriage. These temptations are part of our human weakness. They come from within. They surround us. They arise through our culture, our society, even governments try to impose laws that change and distort the meaning of God’s plan for marriage. 

So many things challenge the relationship of marriage, but grace abounds in our lives if we cooperate with God’s plan and will to build up the relationship of marriage. We might ask how we can live in Christ in order to follow God’s plan.

St. Jerome said ignorance of the Gospel is ignorance of Jesus Christ. You cannot say you know Jesus and not know what he said and taught. By remaining in his word and letting his word live in us, we become a part of him and his life lives in us. 

Married couples are not meant to close in on themselves, to live their lives in a closed self-contained environment. Those living a sacramental life understand the nature of their relationship to Christ and his Church, they hear this silent partner telling them, to go and witness to the world. Go and be missionary disciples. 

The Church also calls upon married couples to engage in ministry to others, to be involved in their parishes. They can share their experience with others by helping engaged couples prepare for a sacramental marriage. They can accompany couples that are hurting due to the loss of a spouse or divorce. Families can assist single parents who need the support of friends who can understand and inspire them. And let us not forget the ministry we owe to the elderly, especially grandparents. 

Above all married couples should be on the front lines to help the Church to promote the dignity and respect for every human life: life in the womb, in prison, on the streets, the poor and young people who need an education. 

May the holy family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph be the supreme model for all married couples and families.